Once we are able to describe the problem without judging the other person, it is important that we are able to clearly tell the person what it is we need. If we can do that, we are giving them the tools that they need to meet our need. Describing our needs in clear terms opens the discussion about what may or may not be realistic. It can be hard to state our needs when we feel that we might be rejected, but it is the way to set ourselves up for success.